BREAVEMENT OF THOSE WHO CARE FOR OTHERS

My dad cared for my mom for several years. He was so involved with her care that he didn’t want me to fly down to California to visit. In his phone calls and letters, he didn’t want me to see how messy the house was. There were some in-home cleaning services he hired to help him, but the deteriorating health of my mom seemed to take up all his energy and time. She eventually ended up in a convalescent hospital where she died in less than 24 hours.

After mom died, dad intended to marry mom’s sister. This lady had cared for her husband who had Parkinson’s Disease. She did not want to care for another man who she would outlive. So dad lived alone in the home they had bought 30 years before. This went on for about six months.

A cousin, who was also my parents’ attorney, called me after my father had shot himself. The suicide note said he was distraught about his medical condition. Bereavement over mom’s passing is what took his life. All there was for my brother and I to do now was to divide up the estate.

I had some counseling and attended a bereavement group after my parents had died. At the time I was working on my MA degree in Psychology. Since my dad’s suicide was the fourth family suicide, I decided to get the MA and go into abstract art (art brut), rather than become a mental health counselor. That was over 20 years ago.

BBC News link below.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-43887636

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