‘Tis the day before the next year when we will celebrate where we have come from and what we plan to be doing for the next 365 days. I hope, dear reader, that is your story. Most of the rest of the world will have welcomed in the new year before midnight reaches those of us living on the West Coast of the U.S.
I have started marking up my 2019 calendar. January 2 will be my 27th month since my stomach cancer diagnosis. Not too shabby for a CA survivor who has, from the start, refused surgery, radiation, chemo, etc…and is doing DO NOT RESUSCITATE-PALLIATIVE CARE ONLY. (Hells bells, I even got kicked out of the hospice house for not dying!) Anxiety, depression, and chronic fatigue remind me that I have not been cured of this maverick disease. And it will “get” me in the end, whenever.
Nästa År i Trelleborg – Next Year in Trelleborg (Sweden)
This is the last day that I will write NEXT YEAR IN TRELLEBORG on my calendar. Tomorrow will start THIS YEAR IN TRELLEBORG. My ashes will have a home in the Trelleborg Cemetery. This will give me 365 days at most to close down in this life before starting my next life. I know that my consciousness does not have the final say as to when bodily cessation will occur. But I have my hopes.
Am I crazy to write what I have written? Most certainly for those who are not suffering from a terminal disease, it is not politically correct to look forward to dying. But in the end as Eva sings, I can only be me.
Music: “I can only be me” by Eva Cassidy